Amateur night

30 Dec

Happy New Year Everybody!

New Year’s Eve is the cosmos giving the world it’s own open-mic at the Improv.  It’s an annual event where everyone feels the pressure to be wild, wacky, dress like a slut/gigolo and create barf art the next morning.  It’s the ultimate Amateur Night, complete with goofy glasses and sparkly noise-making props.  Why?

My Militia was bigger than yours

Admittedly, I gave in and ran with the throng in my late teens and early 20s.  Atlantans, remember that national headline making New Year’s Eve 1988 soiree at the Marriott Marquis?  The one where furniture was thrown into the atrium, windows were broken, people got trampled, huge planters overturned and general hell broke loose?  Hot Damn was there; she remembers.  I fled the scene to go hang by the fireplace at Clarence Foster’s.  Children of the 1980’s, do you remember when we finally were able to fulfill Prince’s wish and “got to party like it’s 1999”?  I had a two year old and my mother had just died…I just wanted to sleep like it was 1970.  In more recent years we were locked and loaded for the big Y2K celebration.  We were stocked on liquor, pantry staples, jugs of filtered water, candles, paper calendars, batteries, firearms and ammunition.  I remember sitting on my deck with friends and when the stroke of midnight came, it also went without pause.  I mean, I’m glad I didn’t loose data or have to shoot someone trying to steal dogfood out of the garage, but it was mildly disappointing, at the least annoying, to not even have the lights flicker.

You can't get this view from the ground

Now that I am older, wiser and decidedly more lazy, we don’t go out on New Year’s Eve.  We’ve got nothing to prove, but we do have a kick ass deck and den.  We may have friends over and play games with the kids, but the main pull is watching Atlanta’s stellar attempt to compete with New York, London, Hong Kong and Sydney’s rich and lauded celebrations.  Atlanta has given us the “Peach Drop”.  The Peach Drop has it’s own web page filled with fun facts.  Here’s a fun fact: Hot Damn was at Underground Atlanta the first year this went down, in 1989.  I was terrified of getting shanked, so I bolted for Fat Tuesday’s.  The site states that this televised event is watched by millions of folks around the globe.  Say what?  Our tradition of watching safely from home has only been sweetened by the addition of a DVR, so that certain bits can be rewound or paused for closer inspection and catty commenting.  Like when the Peach didn’t drop in a fluid motion and jerked all the way down.  Or the year the headliner was so baked, we had to pause and make up funny imaginary dialog for him.

Really? The best we could get? Really?

Already, this year’s Peach Drop is shaping up to maybe be the most craptacular yet.  The headliner is host Katherine Jackson and son, Tito.  (You know Tito.  I couldn’t pick him out of a line up, but he has my almost favorite Jackson name.)  In addition to performing “soulful harmonies” of the Jackson 5, Tito will be kicking out some of his own original jams from his upcoming album.  This means that we won’t need to pause the TV for potty breaks and drink refills.  And there will be “other Jackson family members” present and celebrating, too.   I am praying that I will get a glimpse of Jermaine’s child, Jermajesty…who has the   b e s t  n a m e  e v e r !


2 Responses to “Amateur night”

  1. Tracy December 30, 2010 at 3:52 pm #

    Isn’t your daughter named after Jermaine’s? I could sware that is what we call her 🙂

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