Best dressed

4 Jan

Who doesn't want giant underpants?

So, I just became privy to this company called Big Bloomers.  Can you guess what they sell?  No?  Absolutely enormous panties.  As in size 15XL.  Take a moment, if you need to.  I know that I am on record as having a love of granny-panties, but this exceeds anything I could have imagined.  Maybe that’s because these racy under things cannot be bought in stores.   After cruising their website, I can’t help thinking that they are like a hammock…for your caboose.

What other kinds of clothes are there that you can only find out there on “the internets”?

Well, there is this:

Sprite Randy Constan as the Little Blue Boy

Occasionally, I visit the website of Peter Pan devotee Randy Constan.  You know, just to check in.  He is, in a word…magical.  I weep rainbow-tinted tears every time I get caught up with Randy.  In addition to being a self proclaimed “guitarist, inventor, engineer, and eternal child”, he is just so much more.  When not tending to his Common Sense Christianity ministry or working as a computer programmer, Randy replicates many fancy costumes like Peter Pan, Little Lord Fauntleroy and Thomas Gainsborough’s famous Blue Boy.  He can custom make something special for you too.



Then there is this.  When her grown brother came out to her as an “adult baby”, Marci began making precious outfits for him.  So began a lucrative business, Forever a Kid, making man-sized sun-suits, diaper covers, footie pajamas, bonnets…I’m sure you get the idea.  Marci also makes rompers and bishop dresses for big little girls, too.  This company is based in Canada.  Quelle surprise!  I wonder if her clients embrace the adult baby lifestyle by still living at home.  Duh.

You put your jeans in my pajamas! You put your pajamas in my jeans!

And I would be remiss if I didn’t give a shout to Pajama Jeans.   This hybrid is actually something that is not in stores, but I discovered on TV.  It’s where two kinds of casual collide.  It’s the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup of the fashion world, if you will.  You see, they are pajama bottoms that look like jeans.  Get it?  They are pajamas that you are encouraged to wear, without shame, while shopping, riding a bike (?), or out to lunch with friends.  Um, if you are wearing these to do anything other than drive to carpool or get your Thorazine refilled, you either a) don’t have any friends or b) your friends are inviting you out for lunch to stage an intervention.  Pajama Jeans, available in eight sizes, are described as being stylish, sexy, soft and comfortable. And, if you order a pair, they come with a bonus grey crewneck t-shirt.  I suspect they also come with a scratch and sniff card that smells like giving up.

I’m afraid to delve much further into the world of no-rack clothing.  If Big Daddy ever does a forensic study on my computer, he’s going to think that I am developing fetishes that can’t be easily explained.  Do you know what Pony People are?  Mashers?  These groups both have special footwear that you can order online, too.   I can’t even go there (but probably will at some future time).  There isn’t enough bleach to wash clean what my eyes have seen.


One Response to “Best dressed”

  1. Laurel January 4, 2011 at 4:36 pm #

    That’s taking one for the team. You find this stuff so we don’t have to.

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